Embracing the Art of Positivity

When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.
-James 3: 3-12


I have been challenged lately...It seems like every Kairos service or church service, God's been telling my the same thing..."Katie...Watch your tongue!". I know the typical church use of the verses above is about gossip but that's not the main part I've been convicted about...It's being positive with my words.

Let's face it, we live in a very negative world. It's very easy to be caught up in it....always being negative in situations...looking at the most horrible outcome that could come out of a situation and dwelling on it, bringing everyone down with us. There's something so wrong with that. As Christians, we need to be the hope in those situations. It's impossible to do that when you're right there beside them discussing the negative. I believe the words that come out of our mouths have enormous power. They determine how people perceive you, if people want to be around you or not, your testimony to the lost, everything.

So here's my deal....I'm going to really try to start being a positive person...just as much inside as out. I'm not going to be fake about it. There are times when "negative" things need to be discussed, but as much as possible I want to have a positive outlook. I want people to think of me as a positive person. Hold me accountable, friends.

On another note....I'm absolutely falling in love with my major. My classes are bringing me so much deeper into the art world than I've ever been. I've had a few assignments to look up certain artists and research them and their work and it's truly been so inspiring. I put up "A Starry Night" by Van Gogh just because it's always been my favorite piece of art. I know it's your typical art piece but it's so beautiful. It's official. I'm turning into an art freak. and I couldn't care less :)

*scatter brain attacks again* ITS FALL! :)
oh. my. goodness! I cannot explain to you how happy this makes me. Fall is my absolute favorite season. It's so beautiful....gorgeous changing of leaves, crisp fall air, bonfires, sweaters and sweatshirts, hot chocolate, birthday, and Thanksgiving. all lovely reasons to love fall. :)

I believe that is all for tonight, friends.
Thanks for reading.

Love. Love. Love.
Katie

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Back to School Bash...er...Crash.

Isaiah 43:1-4 (The Message version)

But now, God's Message, the God who made you in the first place, Jacob,
the One who got you started, Israel:
"Don't be afraid, I've redeemed you.
I've called your name. You're mine.
When you're in over your head, I'll be there with you.
When you're in rough waters, you will not go down.
When you're between a rock and a hard place,
it won't be a dead end—
Because I am God, your personal God,
The Holy of Israel, your Savior.
I paid a huge price for you:
all of Egypt, with rich Cush and Seba thrown in!
That's how much you mean to me! That's how much I love you! I'd sell off the whole world to get you back, trade the creation just for you.

Read that a few time....let it soak in. Isn't it beautiful? We are so loved.

Hello there my lovely readers (Can I call you that? You've probably all abandoned me by now. I've been so behind!) I hope you are all doing well. As you can probably tell by my lack of updates, school is back in full swing. We've been in class three weeks now...and boy has it kept me busy! Heres the run down of what I'm into this semester.

• Drawing One- Love it so far. I'm not good at drawing by any means but Erin (my professor) is so patient and great at explaining and helping us become better. A normal class day consists of 3 hours behind an easel drawing away at still life, learning new techniques etc. I was nervous when I started it but love it now.
  
• Three Dimensional Design- I took 2D design last semester...now onto 3D! This class is all about creating design in a three dimensional area instead of a 2D flat space. It's a lot of hands on. I spent last week in the woodshop with 4 different types of saws, sanders and drills galore! It's definetly out of my comfort zone since I'm used to working in 2D type of design but it's a lot of fun learning to build 3D designs and working with different materials.
  
• Graphic Design Technologies- The first of many graphic design classes I'll be taking. It's fun so far...We've just been hitting on some photoshop for the most part. Some of the stuff I know, but it's a good "refresher" so to speak. My professor knows Gillette, my graphics teacher from UU and they are eerily similar.
• US History 1- This is a 3 hour, one night a week night class that just might be the death of me. If ever I have an attention disorder, it surfaces in this class. Covering 2 chapters a night is not my ideal history class but it's worth it to not have class on Fridays. (woo!)
  

...and THAT is the way the cookie crumbles, my friends. Taking 3 studio classes was probably not the best idea but I'll make it. So if I don't update as often...the above list is why. ;)

In other areas....

I'm still a "wanderer" church wise. Although, I think...THINK....I might be one step closer in finding my church. I visited the church that holds Kairos on Tuesday nights this morning and loved it. It reminded me SO much of my church in Jackson that I've missed so much. Not to mention, what's better than hearing Pastor Mike every Tuesday at Kairos? Hearing him on Sundays too! :) Needless to say I'm excited. I'll be praying about it. It's a weird place to be
in where you haven't had a true "home church" in 9 months, especially when you've been raised in the same church since you were five. but it's a learning experience, to say the least.

On another note, I had a..."friend"....I hadn't talked to in two years contact me last Friday. It was unexpected and somewhat shocking really since I expected to never hear from him again. I was sad to learn that he is not who he used to be in several ways...It breaks me heart to see someone who once used to be sold out for the lost, losing his way. What really...sucks...is that I have no way of contacting him to encourage him. He IM-ed me....and we talked...and he got off. so unless he gets back on (which he never does), I'll just have to pray. My heart breaks for him on so many levels...

Okay I'm a little behind on being the proud aunt! Here's a more recent picture of my sweet bug!
Is he not the most adorable thing you've ever seen? Goodness he is getting SO big. He'll be walking in no time!

Well I believe thats all :) I'll try to keep up with this as best I can through the semester but there's just no telling. :)

Love. Love. Love.
-Katie

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A rant. Consider yourself warned.

This is the air I breathe
This is the air I breathe
Your holy presence
Living in me

This is my daily bread
This is my daily bread
Your very word
Spoken to me

And I ... I'm desparate for you
And I ... I'm lost without you

I've always loved this song... It's so simple yet speaks write to the center of how I feel when life gets overwhelming. Those days when I don't know how I'm going to finish the day, but somehow....only through God's strength, I make it.

It's been one of those weeks. actually. two weeks. Union starts classes tomorrow. I honestly don't know why it's been so upsetting for me this time around. In January when they started back, I was fine. I had accepted the fact that I wasn't going to be there anymore. Not this time around... I find myself overwhelmed with jealousy when I get on facebook and see all my UU friends statuses about moving back in/seeing everyone/classes starting. Not "simple" jealousy of aw. i miss it. I'm talking anger jealousy. Crying I get so worked up over it. I miss it. everything about it and I'm tired of hiding it. I miss my roommates, my friends, classes, the professors, chapels, my church there, my college ministry there, jackson, random trips to the playground in the middle of the night, friends marathons when i should be studying, always having a friend around to talk to. everything.

To be honest, God and I have been at odds the last few weeks over this. I know this isn't "His fault". It's no one's fault. It's just life. but goodness...I'm really struggling to understand why I'm here and not there. I'm tired of people saying they understand. saying "God has you here for a reason". I know that. Unless the next sentence out of your mouth is going to tell me what that reason is, please don't say that to me.

I don't mean this to be a complaining rant type of blog entry...but it's just how I'm feeling right now. This blog isn't for me to paint a pretty picture of a picture perfect life. It's my life and its far from perfect....which means a few blogs every now and again will be a big of complaining and ranting.

....I guess that song says it best. I'm desperate for Him. Right now I'm completely drained inside. I just need to get away for a while and think. My best friend Elizabeth and I are going to the lakehouse this weekend. Perfect timing.

Thanks for reading....

Love. love. love.
Katie

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Summer of Love :)

"The world did not create beauty, the world cannot define it." -Mike Glenn

This summer has been one of the biggest blessings to me personally. I've mentioned a few times on here that some friends and I have been going to Kairos (a college ministry, not a Greek restaurant for those wondering:) every Tuesday night. I cannot explain to you how much of a blessing it has been for me. Mike Glenn is the speaker and has been doing a summer series on love, relationships, beauty and all that falls into that. Mike's style of teaching is so different from anyone I've listened to. He is straightforward, blunt and completely transparent with us. There is no beating around the bush with him which I've come to appreciate a lot in a world where it always seems to take people 10 times as long to say what they're trying to say. He tells it like it is and has an amazing passion for it. anyways....I just thought I'd share a little about what God's been showing me this summer.

The Importance of a REAL relationship with Christ.
We started out the summer establishing the real foundation for all of this...a true relationship with Christ. I so often fall into the category of Christians who come to Christ only on a "need" basis. When things start falling apart, I run to Him to fix them but when things are going fine, I tend to leave Him be. This is one really big area in my life personally that I need to work on. Mike real drove in a point when he started talking about how we say "God is a big part of my life." when we should be saying "God IS my life."

The Importance of embracing where you are now.
God has each of us exactly where we are right now for a reason. It's hard not to wait anxiously for the future. I, along with almost everyone else my age, need to embrace my "season of singleness". God is preparing each of us for what we will encounter in the future....but if we are constantly looking at the future then how can we learn what He has for us here and now to learn?

The Importance of finding a Godly man.
"If you cannot see daily evidence of his walk with Christ, Leave." <-- Talk about being blunt! It's not enough to find a man who call himself a Christian. There must be evidence of his relationship with Christ. I've always heard growing up from different people to "not be too picky" when it comes to guys but for one of the first times I actually decided that I need to make a list of things I will not waiver on when it comes to a man I will spend my life with. I want a man after God's own heart and nothing less.
-The night we spent talking about Godly men, we talked about Joseph (Jesus' earthly father) and then people from his lineage. A big thing I'd never noticed about Joseph was how much he really truly cared for Mary even before he realized that she truly was carrying the son of God...It says that he "decided to divorce her secretly". Joseph, thinking that his fiance has cheated on him, did not want to embarrass her by any means. He still cared enough for her to not want to cause her any more pain and embarrassment than was already present. I think that speaks tons about his character. Not many people have that much character, myself included, that we'd let it go quietly.)

The Importance of being a Godly woman.
If I'm going to hold my future husband to high standards, I need to hold myself to the same. In all reality, a man seeking God's own heart is going to want a woman seeking God's own heart. I need to use the time God has given me to be preparing myself to be the woman I need to be. If I spend all my time focusing on finding "Mr. Right" and not focusing on getting myself to where I need to be spiritually, I won't be ready when he comes along.

The Importance of recognizing real beauty.
This is kind of where the quote at the very top comes in. Right now, our culture is so infatuated with what they call "beauty". Size 0, flawless skin, 5'8'', shallow as get out beauty. The quote at the top is so simple....but so true. The world did not create beauty, the world cannot define it. Our culture is driving woman into their graves with eating disorders and depression because the standards they set for beauty aren't achievable. Real beauty is something that starts from the inside. As Mike put it...."True beauty is something you can see even in the dark."


I guess that pretty much hits all the main points God's been really teaching me this summer. I hope it blesses you as much as it has me. Please send up a prayer for Kairos on Tuesday nights if you think of it. God is doing some amazing things there....we even got mentioned on a major "non-christian" radio station a few weeks back and have since been literally overflowing with people coming. The last 3 weeks people have had to sit on the floor...over 1,300 people recently!
Feel free to come with me sometime too! We have a group that goes each week of between 4 and 8 people. It's so much fun :)

Hope yall are having a great week.

Love. Love. Love.
Katie

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Just an update :)

"No, life cannot be understood flat on a page. It has to be lived; a person has to get out of his head, has to fall in love, has to memorize poems, has to jump off bridges into rivers, has to stand in an empty desert and whisper sonnets under his breath... We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and resolution. It would be a crime not to venture."
-Donald Miller-- "Through Painted Deserts"

-The book from which that quote came is one of my absolute favorites. It's been about a year since I've read it and I should really read it again. It made me want to get in my car and take off for a few weeks. To just live life for what it was worth...enjoying every minute, going where ever I felt like, sleeping under the stars and discovering God in all types of new ways. It STILL makes me want to do that just thinking about it. Such an awesome book.

A few thing on my mind tonight....

• Dating/relationships- Goodness...I've discovered in the last few months that it just scares me to death. As much as I want to be in a relationship right now, I know I'm not because God is still preparing both me and my future spouse for each other. I just want to know if I know him yet... it'll be interesting to see how all of it unfolds whether it be soon or in a year or two (eep!). I need to be patient....Good things come to those who wait, right?
  

• Health- I love love love the track at MT's rec center. Don't ask me what is so exciting about walking in circles but I find it so much more appealing than treadmills and the like. I do believe I'll head there some time tomorrow.
  

• Reading- I don't know what has gotten into me lately but I cannot stop reading. In the last 2 weeks I've read 2379 pages. I'm about to need a new book/series. Any suggestions?

• Redecorating- My room is in desperate need of some attention. It is both a wreck and utterly horrible in the design area. It's about to drive me nuts. I've at least got to decide on a color to paint the wall by the end of the summer. Then try to find a new idea for what to do with the furniture. Not to mention buy a new mattress. My back has been killing me lately....come to find out my mattress is as old as I am. Dear paycheck gods, send money quickly! :)
  

That's the end of the blog for today. I am completely aware that this was a completely pointless entry but I thought I'd give a little update to those who care. I hope everyone is having a blessed summer.

Love. Love. Love.
Katie

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Bondage through Religion; Freedom through the Cross

"Religion and humanity bring nothing but bondage. It is only the Cross that brings freedom."

I am not a Biblical scholar by any means. I wish I understood the Bible better and could sit down with a 3,000 page book by some brilliant man who did but it's just not me. God teaches me through life. I learn by experiencing.

The quote at the top of this blog is one I heard in church this morning and it just stuck with me. The rest of the sermon on Repentance and Freedom was amazing as well and maybe I'll write something about that later on.

I've been so puzzled lately with religion. It seems like the last six months for me have been full of question and lessons about the church as a whole. Through it all, I've learned exactly what the quote at the top says...Religion brings bondage. Church too often becomes about going to a certain place at a certain time,seeing certain people, singing certain songs, and doing certain things. It's all just so messed up. Church is not a building. It's the people of God coming together to worship Him. So simple yet we make is so complicated. I've been so guilty of that. I realized that about myself when I was talking to a good friend the other day about how I left my old church. I was telling her about how hurt I felt that after I left my church of almost 15 years, only 2 people even said anything. I was hurt. But i've come to realize that my focus was all wrong. I was too focused on the people and not focused enough on finding my place to worship. Does it still hurt? Sure, if i think about it...but I'm trying my best to let go of that and remember that that is not what church is about.

Freedom only comes through the cross. Not through a certain denomination, not through a certain song or sermon....through the cross. I still struggle with completely focusing on Christ during church. Its hard to get my mind to slow down enough to really focus but I find that when I do and I hear what He is saying to me, I feel free. I feel like all the struggles that I carried into His presence have been thrown to the other side of the earth. Christ brings such freedom to those who open their hearts enough to let Him in.

So I don't know if what I said made much sense. Its just been something I've been thinking about lately and this mornings sermon made me think about it a little more.

On to other things... Life right now is good. I've been figuring out a lot of things...thinking too much for my own good. Just ask any of my good friends. haha. I've been picking at their brains about a few things the last week or so. I'm extremely blessed to have some of the friends I have. They are straight up with me... calling me out on areas I stumble in. It not always easy but I do appreciate it so much. Friends like that are worth more than words.

I believe that's all for today...I hope everyone had a great 4th!

Love. Love. Love.
Katie

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A mini update :)

Hello all!

Geez I'm behind!
Okay...here's a mini update on life.

-Lost 15 pounds as of last Thursday! woot! Who knows if tomorrow will be as gracious. haha. this week has been crazy and not the "healthiest". Oh well...It's part of it!

-Work is great! I don't remember if I said it in the last post or not....no more working at Portrait Innov....I'm just working at the Cafe now. It was just too stressful for me. I'm loving working at Goodness Gracious though.

-I've been hanging out with my childhood best friend a lot lately :) Brooke and I have known each other since we were 18 months old. I love her like a sister. I'm so glad we're hanging out again.

-In other realms.... just.... :) haha...I'll elaborate more on that soon. maybe. ;)

Over all, life is good...summer is relaxing....and I'm happy.

I promise...a better blog will come soon. :) Patience, my dears!

Love. Love. Love.
Katie

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